I heard something today that was really good and wanted to share it: "first thing you have to know your own heart, and after that you have to risk breaking it"...something to think about i guess. Some say they dont want to do something because they will be hurt, but we have to risk that possibility of maybe being hurt to become better, a greater person and to be happy.

My best friend and brother told me something just recently: "it matters what your doing not what you've done, that what determines you" He is right...Im going to try to remember this

Ever feel like you have a mask on? That you can not take it off? That you are hiding behind some image of the past that you have not purposely made? I know how you feel...the past year has been interesting.Taking off this mask means letting people in, I dont know if I can do this.It is a long process of forgiveness, letting go, love, being happy and knowing what I want. I have only done half of these. I now feel like whenever I try to get close to someone or visa versa I close up and put up a wall- like the great wall of china. I am honestly scared to be close to someone. I don't know how to handle it. I want to put the wall down but I don't know how to...I am working on it, but how is still a mystery.

Take a look at the lyrics in the post right before this one. This is how I feel men should treat women. How in the past I wish I was treated by so many guys. So just think about it. This is what a woman wants: to feel wanted and important to you. not forgotten or an item. this is not how i am treated now, but in the past yes. So many men or guys I have dated it felt like it was just a physical thing, a hookup, fling or whatever...it always ended up shattering both myself and my confidence. It hurts more than you know to tell someone that you love them, and to think things will work out but then they end up not. And he turns up to be a complete jerk. And you realize how happy you are now that things did not work out. But then it felt...well there are no words in how to describe it. Also to tell someone that you are falling in love with them for them to say to you they hate love,and think love is man's greatest weakness. Then you things are just confusing after that because you don't know how to take that. Just want to say....men-boys-guys..treat your woman that you are interested in how you treat your mom. Treat her with respect, honor and love. And woman do the same to your guy that you are interested in. Always be honest in what you do, say or think. This is everything this song makes me think of when I listen to it. But then it also makes me so happy when i hear it, because how sweet and gentle it is. It is the most endearing song, that I listen to right now. And how it makes me feel confident in things in life.

" You know I'd fall apart without you I don't know how you do what you do 'Cause everything that don't make sense about me Makes sense when I'm with you Like everything that's green, girl I need you But it's more than one and one makes two Put aside the math and the logic of it You gotta know you want it too/ 'Cause I wanna wrap you up Wanna kiss your lips I wanna make you feel wanted And I wanna call you mine Wanna hold you hand forever Never let you forget it Yeah, I wanna make you feel wanted/ Anyone can tell you you're pretty (Yeah) You get that all the time, I know you do But your beauty's deeper than the makeup And I wanna show you what I see tonight When I kiss your lips I wanna make you feel wanted And I wanna call you mine Wanna hold you hand forever Never let you forget it 'Cause baby I wanna make you feel wanted/ As good as you make me feel I wanna make you feel better Better than your fairy tales Better than your best dreams You're more than everything I need You're all I ever wanted All I ever wanted/ And I just wanna wrap you up Wanna kiss your lips I wanna make you feel wanted And I wanna call you mine Wanna hold you hand forever Never let you forget it Yeah, I wanna make you feel wanted Yeah, baby I wanna make you feel - Wanted/ 'Cause you'll always be wanted" ----Wanted by Hunter Hayes